Saturday, March 31, 2007
woah man,
i finally got to wear my number 1!
haha. woke up at normal school time,
reached queenstown by 7.
haha.you know, when we got to HTA,
we were the only ones in number 1!
omg. everyone gotta ear 1/2 u !
OMG. SO EVIL LAH. anyway, luckily
i brought belt ! ma'ams didn't *sigh*
i did the full thing today lor. for the
first time. ugh. so screwed up can?
i'm really sad for the CIs, we're not
an easy bunch to teach, n they work
so hard, yet that sir go scold them
like shit. like wth can? he was
talking about manners n HELLO ?
he should go watch his own mouth
he doesn't have the right to scold
ppl with vulgarities. wah lao. so
frustrated. ugh. anyway, someone
fainted ok. i saw some red cross
ppl run towards one of the contingents,
n its the proper red cross, not students.
i saw them carry one of the supporting
contingent cadets away on a stretcher
and the ambulance left. omg. i think
he/she went to hospital. aiyoh. the
henderson guys crazy can? haha.
anyway, i love the number one ! its
so pretty. haha. i am dead tired.
oh man. haha. i have been a bad girl.
muahahaha.
his darling baby =D
the emerald ocean
8:42:00 PM
Thursday, March 29, 2007
shit.i'm really lost now.i dunno what to do.i'm worried about two things,very impt things.shit. i dunno what to do. i'm really well, pissed off and worried.shit. there's a good chance geraldine'sright. but i'm really hoping she isnt.i'm really hoping.this shouldn't be making my life worse.shit. i need a counsellor that won't tell me to stop seeing him.shit lah. that doesn't exist.i dunno what to do man.shit lah.who's gonna give the answer i want?
the emerald ocean
9:18:00 PM
Wednesday, March 28, 2007
i know. i sound like a stupid girl,
thats all lovey or whatever,
but thats ur problem if you think
that. i'm happy. i've got someone
that loves me. and thats all i need
right now. especially happiness.
do you know how long its been
since i was really happy? im happy
now. and thats all thats important.
i think there are many people
whom i owe thanks to.
ashley>for brightening up my life,
and making me smile. hey girlfriend,
we must always keep in touch no
matter what k? thank you.
geraldine>all through these 3 years
and 3 months (will be four) it is you,
i know best. without you, i'd probably
be in a very different state. i wouldnt
be the way i am in sec school. thank you.
annie>for showing me, that sometimes,
being bad is fun.thank you.
govin>for making me happy, for bringing
the smile back to me at night. thank you.
i'm not done. but thats all i can do today
what more could a girl ask for?
the emerald ocean
9:45:00 PM
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
brains don't make a man.
i gotta say that. really.
cos some of the smartest guys,
bring their dates out and split
the cost on everything. and they're
grown men, with salary. stupid.
whereas, a teen,not the smartest,
pays for everything on a date.
i'm serious. well, i have officially
broken one of the most impt rules
of my mum. the dating rule. according
to her, i'm not suppose to date till i'm
21, cos APPARENTLY, any guy younger
than that can't bring u to a nice
restaurant on a date. who said it was
about where you go? what you eat? thats
just one of the things and it isn't even
important. you could sit in a food court and
talk and that beats any prim and proper
restaurant. i think the most important
thing is his personality and sincerity.
so far, when i think about the factors for
the 'perfect' boyfriend, govin comes the
closest. considerate, kind, not afraid to talk
about anything, funny, hot(haha), and well,
he cares about ewhat i feel about things and
he makes me smile, he may be in normal acad,
and he may be buddhist but, i said right?
brains don't make a man, and religion should
not be a problem. and this is just a teenage
relationship. i never said anything about
getting married, ha. so why be so serious,
of course, meeting up could be difficult, and
could mean many more lies, but hey, anything
for my happiness. anyway, he came and met
me at about 4. we ate at the food court den we
went up to buy tickets for the messengers,
haha. the movie was scary. but i get freaked out
about everything anyway. i shall not write the
next part. cos it sounds weird when i type it.
ask me if you wanna know. and no, he did not
kiss me. cos thats just crazy for a first date.
anyway. i'm happy. so be happy for me, yah?
who knew it was you.
the emerald ocean
8:06:00 PM
Monday, March 26, 2007
i watched music and lyrics with casandra
just now. i was a really good show. =D
im gonna watch the messengers with
govin tmr. =D no more seperation
anxiety . haha. he got another phone.
cos he lost his. haha. life is pretty
interesting now, though im not
suppose to say most of it. oh well.
unit stand down. so happy. but i hate
it that i have to miss learning fest.
stupid NPDP training. sometimes,
i hate it. ugh. anyway. i wanna sleep
early,or i'll have dark rings. ew. ugh.
i love weekends u know. i like saturday
nights n sundays. anyway. going for
confession finally on wed. i shall wear,
my pink top, black skirt, black wedges.
and, er, pink hoop earrings. yay. i
memorise my wardrobe so i can plan
my outfits when i'm bored. *pause* no
one said i was NORMAL. haha. anyway,
i gtg now, bye bye faithful readers, no
matter how few...
you've brought me out of that state,you've helped me to the next stage,of forgetting that f-ed up bastard,but still my my mind lingers,once in a while,so don't let me go...
the emerald ocean
10:18:00 PM
Just another teenI’m just living the way I want,
I’m just having all the fun,
I bet I’m happier than you,
Don’t you wish you were me too?
Ha. I wish that’s the way my life was
But it’s all just a dream cos,
[Chorus]
I’m just like any other teen,
Wishing for the freedom of life,
I’m no different from you,
We’re all the same,
I might get a bigger allowance,
But who said money was life?
Cos we’re all in this together,
Don’t you see I’m going through,
Everything you do.
So come on,
Anything good that happens never lasts,
Just an hour on and its all in the past,
We’re all stressed out about on thing or another,
Don’t know if I can keep living much longer.
[Chorus]
Suicide seems like the best way out,
All they say makes you wanna shout,
“I wanna die!” get me out of here,
I know you’ll miss me dear.
[Chorus]
All these songs I write,
I wanna get them sung,
A dream I have,
Hope the chance will come,
It’s just a little wish,
Surely that’s alright?
I have dreams like any other teen.
[Chorus]
I’m just like any other teen,
Can’t you see? Don’t you understand?
Shit, just stop this childish game,
We’re all the same,
We face all the same problems everyday
Stop being angry with me,
All these problems just aren’t my fault
Go blame the adults, its all them
Oh come on, come on,
You know it.
i wrote this. pro or noob? your choice
the emerald ocean
12:03:00 AM
Sunday, March 25, 2007
today i break out from my emo self.
i havent been happier in a long time.
i managed to get a top from ebase,
n a polka dot skirt, pink tank top n
shorts! from m)phosis. i love that place.
so cool. damn happy, n i found out sth,
that totally made my day. =D i saw
someone staring at me on saturday,
thought it was pretty weird. n i was
laughing too much to think about it
properly anyway. but now that i do,
it strikes me as odd and impossible,
oh well, maybe i was hallucinating,
haha. but i think i was being stared at.
anyway. its quite funny, flattering if
it was really true. haha. my dear lost
his handphone, so i'm suffering from
seperation anxiety-cannot sms, haha.
haiyoh. how to plan dates? i dunno.
he not often online lor. somemore this
week i super free. oh i'll figure it out.
anyway, life is nice now, i think. going
for confession on wed, wah, i'll be there
for hours man. jk. i can't but i do have
alot to confess. thats not good, but hey,
im a teen right? haha. 14 this year, yay.
7mnths to go. haha.anyway. its getting
late. it is late. gtg.
the emerald ocean
11:08:00 PM
Saturday, March 24, 2007
shit. i screwed up corporal.
ugh, don't wanna talk about it.
------------------lovelove-------------lovelove---------------lovelovelove---------lovelovelove------------lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove---------lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove-------lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove-------lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove---------lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove-----------lovelovelovelovelovelovelovelovelove-------------lovelovelovelovelovelovelveolove----------------lovelovelovelovelovelovelove------------------lovelovelovelovelovelove---------------------lovelovelovelovelove-----------------------lovelovelovelove--------------------------lovelovelove----------------------------lovelove------------------------------lovepure boredom.
life is scaring me.
things are happening.
and they confuse me.
i dunno what to make out of it.
its freaky.
and strange.
and well, not possible.
no that it really makes me unhappy.
but just strange.
well.
i might probably NOT find out.
so happy guessing for me.
the emerald ocean
5:57:00 PM
Friday, March 23, 2007
i realised that no matter how tiring NPDP
is, i still love it. i love it the same as ballet
class, where you're surrounded by people
that all share a common interest, a common
goal, thats to pass ballet exams and enjoy it.
in NPDP, i am surrounded by nothing but
ma'ams, sirs and more ma'ams n sirs, but
we all share a common interest, NP and a
common goal, to get NPDP right. its a great
feeling when you know you can't be left out,
and everyone is just as tired as you are.
at the end, we sit and joke with the area 14
ppl with whatever energy we have left. its
amazing to see all the flag bearers, GOH and
contingents all together. its just amazing when
you hear that one solid bang, and you see a few
hundred legs doing hentak kaki in unison. its
just 'wow'. im serious.i can't help but bypass all
the hardships and be happy to have taken up
the offer. i am happy. tmr is promo, i'll be
polishing my boots in a while. and i'll just hope
for the best.
the emerald ocean
10:47:00 PM
Thursday, March 22, 2007
i wrote this song this afternoon,
JustJust the kiss that’ll make me push everything away,
Just the one that’ll stop time and never let it go,
Just the one that I’m looking for all this while,
Jus the one I’m still searching for.
Just the love of a guy that I could never ask for,
Just how much he gives me I could never believe,
Just the little things he says that make me laugh,
Just his words that make me smile.
It’s just everything he does,
That I never knew could be real,
But I see it now,
And everything is just too good to be true.
Just the girl that’s writing this,
Just the girl that’s loving him,
Just the girl that could never ask for more,
Just the girl that’s wishing it’ll never end.
Just our simple little story,
Just those few years back that we first met,
Just the courage you gathered to ask me,
Just the good times that we had.
We’re just wanting it to last forever,
All the memories we’ll hold together,
All we did for each other,
It’s just the love we share.
Will you hold me close forever?
Will be just us forever?
Will you be mine forever?
Will we just be the best?
Let’s just forget the world,
Let’s just concentrate on us,
Cos you know it’s just what we want,
So let’s just keep loving each other,
Let’s just…
yup.thats it. i'm not talking abt myself k.
its just random.and i gotta try and make
the tune for it. then it'll be complete.
the emerald ocean
9:56:00 PM
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
shut out, all the troubles let it go,
drop all your work, go for a show,
i need to live a little,
but life's so not agreeable,
so i'm stuck here.
dreading my fate so clear.
ugh, my poetry is getting suckier.
shit lah.
i need to do sth.
i dunno what,
but i gotta.
ugh.
i wanna die alrd.
but now's not the time to get suicidal
i gotta sleep on this,
shit lah.
the love of a guy,i could never ask.he's gives me enough to last.forever.
the emerald ocean
11:00:00 PM
Monday, March 19, 2007
wth.
there was an article on EMO TEENS
in the home page today.
wth lah.
its so totally crapped up lah.
like hello?
only way to describe emo accurately
is to have a TEEN write the article.
its so stupid lah.
they're just trying to act like they're
in control .and they understand
everything.
but hello. emo is a FEELING.
omg. they're being ridiculous.
you know, all the books that teach
adults how to understand their
teens, are written by ADULTS.
they all say, try to look from the
teen's point of view, but guess what,
it doesn't work. cos, how would an
adult know anything? you gotta
have it written by a teen man,
or parents will forever be clueless.
so stupid. they think they know it
but they've hardly done anything.
its just so crapped up.
ugh. stupid.
teens are allowed to be strange,
so stop trying to understand it.
life isn't easy as a TEEN
the emerald ocean
11:38:00 PM
Sunday, March 18, 2007
i blogged 4 times ytd.
omg.
i'm siao alrd.
can't believe geraldine n elgyn
r gonna follow me on tuesday.
omg lah.
i think that'll make me super nervous.
ahhh.
die.
how leh.
i dunno what to do lah.
shit. shit.
i wanna die lah.
n y my hits go up but no tag?
ugh.
freaking frustrated.
shit lah.
i wanna die liao.
seriously.
ugh.
someone save me.my life is hitting rock bottom.
the emerald ocean
9:56:00 PM
Saturday, March 17, 2007
the darkness of night,
the thoughts brought to light.
my mind whirls,
the world swirls,
i run out the door,
i hit the floor,
22 storeys down.
the warm trickle,
of the dark liquid down my wrist,
i stare transfixed,
mesmerised,
my own blood.
time seems to stop,
but it passes faster even.
my head feels light,
i hit the floor,
its over, i'm out.
i gotta stop doing this,shit. i'm mentally killing myself.
the emerald ocean
11:43:00 PM
i need to destroy sth.
or cry,
or scream.
n i dun even know y.
shit.
damn lah.
freaking idiot.
y do i always have to be
involved with a 'g' person.
omg.
fuck lah.
i dunno what to do.
im all messed up.
shit.
i dunno what im doing anymore.
maybe its better if i died.
are all teens suicidal?
the emerald ocean
11:38:00 PM
next tuesday.
woah.
get ready,
get set,
DIE.
man,
i dun wanna sound
like a wimp or anything,
but,
im FREAKING NERVOUS.
duh.
ah, i need moral support
but sth's telling me,
i'll be ok on my own.
trust my instincts,
n guess what?
i dun even know what my
instincts are saying.
oh man.
someone HELP?
ah.
i'm gonna die.
help this girl.
the emerald ocean
11:14:00 PM
i think i'm going crazy.
am i going crazy?
i think i am.
ugh.
the emerald ocean
11:18:00 AM
Friday, March 16, 2007
i think. my piano exam sucked,
i dun wanna talk about it.
ugh.
my life is really messed up now.
ugh.
i dunno what to think.
i dunno what to do.
i dunno.
i dunno.
i dunno.
n i hate tuition.
it sucks like hell.
i hate it.
me n tuition just don't click.
really.
n if i could just do a double pirouette tonight.
it would make my day.
totally.
im so crazy that im blogging three times a day.
i know that we can never be.but shit, you're freaking hot.
the emerald ocean
6:00:00 PM
what girl in this world,
wants to get married at thirteen?
all that you say to me,
sounds like you're all grown up.
but i'm not stupid to believe that crap.
what boy of 15 can promise all that?
you say you love me,
but how would you know,
bet you can't even explain it to me.
you wanna know why i never say i love you?
cos i don't know what it is,
and i never wanna give you the wrong idea
cos i'm not as crazy abt you as you think.
no. i'm not,
and i probably will never be,
sorry if you really love me that much,
cos you'll end up getting hurt.
you'll probably will hate me forever,
but what do you expect?
us to get married?
if you do,
you're crazy.
you'd best be getting out of my life.
the emerald ocean
12:48:00 PM
piano exam later.
ha.
anyway.
i dunno what im doing.
i broke my new year's resolution
die lah.
kept it up for 2 1/2 mths?
ha.
whatever lah.
feel like a wreck.
its like,
so stupid can?
ugh.
my life is all fucked up
what have i done
the emerald ocean
12:23:00 PM
its out in the open.
well, sorta.
im still confused ok?
still.
i gotta have more time.
shit. what have i done?
the emerald ocean
12:05:00 AM
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
happy.
sad.
confused.
stressed.
put it together.
you get.
MEcos thats what i am.
happy sad and confused are related.
stressed is a different thing.
since, blogs are open for anyone to read,
i shall not blog about a certain sth.
ha,
anyway.
this year,
might just get more eventful than last yr.
which, can't be good.
i will be placed in a difficult situation,
which i won't be able to handle.
thats just a feeling.
but, i guess i can minimise the impact,
by basically not being stupid.
but,
if it hits me bad,
i'll probably, err. get suicidal again.
ugh.
save me someone.
im drowning.
love huh?what is it anyway.
the emerald ocean
9:18:00 PM
i am a princess. ha
the emerald ocean
10:36:00 AM
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
i actually thought.
i couldn't get anymore confused.
well, here i am.
so dazed i can't even think properly.
i'm 13.
n a 14 yr old,
confesses to me like we're gonna get married.
damn freaky.
and no.
i'm not answering any questions.
i am freaked.
its not that easy,you can say what you want,but how would i know ,you could have said it tothe other girls too.i'm not stupid you know
the emerald ocean
11:14:00 PM
sth big big big just happened to me.
but its my secret. n it'll stay that way.
i'm quite er...shocked by it? but anyway.
too bad if you wanna know. cos i'm not
saying anything. ha.
i'll skip the forgiving, cos you know i can't n i'll just forget
the emerald ocean
7:47:00 PM
omg. camp was like.
so slack compared to last year.
i mean , well, i wasn't around on the first day
so maybe i don't know. but my squadmates
who were around all said it was slacker
so i guess it is.it was like. i go by days lah.
easier.
10 march,saturdayi woke up at 8 am?
ya. around there.
den i was like. eat breakfast. blah blah blah.
den i got my stuff. den i went for theory exam.
wah. this super small girl sitting beside me.
maybe abt pri 1, pri 2? taking same paper as me !
omg. grade 5 lor. anyway. i finished abt 11.15am?
den me n geraldine we went to eat at macs! haha.
den we chiong take mrt to cgs. den when we got there,
we were walking behind mdm lim! haha, so funny.
den when we got there,
dey were just getting ready to go for the hike. so
we ran up to the hall dump our stuff grab water bottles
n fall in. i was in grp 4 ! COCOPUFF! haha. so cute.
altho. it wouldnt be my first choice haha.ok . so we walk
walk walk walk walk...to mt. faber. so near can? anyway.
we play play play alot of games, eat stuff, den walk down
frm mt. faber n take BUS BACK! omg. so shuang. haha.
when we got back, we prepared for our campfire
performance. haha. liana was the BIMBO! haha. jessica
ma'am train her, haha. ya. n we had dinner, wash up, blah
blah blah. den campfire !!!! haha. so fun. haha. i love all the
cheers man. n the games so cool. haha.so fun.
wah den kena scold like ku-ku, jiat ru ma'am, jie en ma'am
cynthia ma'am all so super angry.omg omg omg !!!!! casandra
just told me that she saw "something" during sentry duty!
omg. n the sec 1s also say! ahhh!!!!!! omg. so scared. anyway.
we went for night run around school ok! omg. bcos some
cadets keep falling asleep. omg.n my eyes were open so
damn big can? ugh. den finally. we went to sleep. we had
squadtalk for a while, n i cried. haais.den i sleep,so shuang
cos no sentry duty.
11 march,sundaywake up, have pt. it was ok lah,
lucky no need to run to tiong like last year.
we went for archery course! haha.my archery not so good lor.
aiming always off.haha. anyway. it was fun. n i got a nice tan !
=D haha. we went back, had lunch. den have telematch n
treasure hunt. haha. den area clean up. we had to clean the
toilets. i had a few sec1s following me. can't rmb who. so i lead
them around. clean clean den have to clean again cos ma'ams
not satisfied. den me n ah ma help jie en ma'am and li ling
ma'am clean zinc plates. =D haha. den we get our stuff.
wah den zakiah ma'am freaking angry lor.pump us 65 for
ppl that fell out and abandoned water bottles.oh well..
den prize presentation, cocopuff got most united group !
haha. gui mei ma'am is nice. =D anyway. ya. so that was camp.
it was fun lah.
but maybe the sec1s think different differently about np now?
maybe. i don't wanna talk about squadtalk. it was so emotional.
anyway. camp was. alright. can't believe, our squad will be
the ones organising it next year.
the emerald ocean
3:22:00 PM
Sunday, March 11, 2007
call me crazy or whatever.
cos hey ppl, i'm back from camp.
i'll blog in detail tmr.
cos i'm having a really bad headache.
ugh. there is a problem with the sec 1s.
n we,
sec 2 squad '07 ,
has got a problem too.
ugh.
i don't wanna think about it.
life without this year's sec 4 ma'ams is
gonna be difficult.
cos like they said, we r so not role models.
n i agree.
totally.
maybe we're bonded.
but we're still not role models.
i'm falling asleep alrd.
till tmr.
at least, im not crying about you.
the emerald ocean
10:11:00 PM
Friday, March 09, 2007
hey ppl.
won't be around for about two days.
i'm going for unit camp.
probably will blog on monday.
or sunday, if i'm not too tired.
theory exam tmr.
wish me luck !
but i think i'll be ok.
=D
NPDP training was tiring.
i think my arm is gonna break.
anyway.
sec 3 ma'ams are nice =D
haha. i have a crescent flag with me !
muahahahaha,
so fun,
haha.
anyway. i gtg sleep now.
i CANNOT fall asleep during theory.
i will totally MALU myself.
ugh.
a heart that burnspassion stirrs
the emerald ocean
11:33:00 PM
Thursday, March 08, 2007
when i don't see you i'm happy,
and sad.
when i DO see you i'm happy,
and sad.
you
make
me
THISconfused.
and the "funny" thing is,
you don't even know it.
cos who was hurt?
ME.well, if you're hurting too,
you brought it upon yourself.
it doesn't have to be this way.
but.
you.
you spoilt it.
fucking bastard
4 months.
thats how long i've been hurting.
you wouldn't believe it if i told you.
ha.
how i wish you would read all this.
maybe you do?
well. good then.
but i know you aren't. so
WHATEVER.
oh yah.
stop looking at me.
you're freaking the hell out of me.
stop it ok.
you make me fucking confused.
more than i alrd am.
so quit it.
i don't need shit like that to make my life worse.
just leave me be.
i know you'll never make me happy anyway.
so you might as well stop trying to be nice
or whatever.
cos you're just devastating me.
surely you could spare me that.
you know i can never hate you.
you know it.
fucking CT.
the emerald ocean
10:54:00 PM
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
emo.
thats all you can use to describe me.
fuck lah.
sometimes i wish i wasn't in NP.
jeremy sumpter rocks.
and.
i love youtube.
its what keeps me sane.
shit.you know what i am without youyou know how bad you hurt meyou know how much you made me miss youyou know how much _ ____ ___.
the emerald ocean
8:08:00 PM
Monday, March 05, 2007
fuck.
go away.
leave me alone.
stop it.
stop looking at me.
stop messing me up.
i'm trying to recover.
you just keep opening my wound.
fuck. stop it.
you know i can't let you go.
stop rubbing it in.
you're destroying me.
fuck. please.
just this once.
please.
don't make me any more sad.
please.
the emerald ocean
10:35:00 PM
i don't read fanfics !
i write them !
ive only got two chapters in.
though ive written much more.
i decided to allow comments influence
what happens next,
well a little bit anyway
here's the link.
http://winglin.net/fanfic/creznpcadeti may be a bit shitty. but oh well.
first story wat.
ok ok.
bye bye. go read n comment ya?
the emerald ocean
10:00:00 PM
Sunday, March 04, 2007
shit shit shit.
ive had enough.
y are you messing me up.
there were no more signs
i thot it was over
then,
you had to start it again.
you think its funny?
you think its a game?
you're killing me.
fuck.
the emerald ocean
10:28:00 PM
Saturday, March 03, 2007
shit shit shit.
my horoscope today?
"You're holding on to some grudges --
and they're holding you back. Let them go."
wth wth wth wth.
i can't help but believe astrology you know?
ugh
shit shit shit.
how can it be so accurate.
ugh.
shit shit shit.
it sucks.
i DON'T wanna let go
the emerald ocean
6:08:00 PM
ytd was fun fun again,
i fell asleep in the bus cos i was like super tired
n i had chocolate milk for lunch.
imagine doing hentak for 3 hrs straight,
plus ur right arm is holding a flagpole steady
with ur arm parallel to the ground.
what does that feel like? you wanna die.
i was gonna die. n now my arm muscles,
thigh muscles n stomach muscles hurt like siao.
it was so super tiring lor. dear squadmates,
normal np sessions are nothing. wait till you
go for NPDP next year, den you'll vouch for
what i've said. i think ma'ams couldnt get me
to do drills anyway, cos they're doing baton n
rifle drills, which i've obviously havent learnt.
oh well.anyway. it was hell of a session. but as
usual, sec 3 ma'ams all very nice. n sec 4 ma'ams
also. all very nice. haha. i got the form for the new
zealand ballet study tour ! omg. ive been wanting
to go since forever! but my freaking parents
have a problem with it . ugh, n i wanna go japan
also ! how how. i really wanna go for both. but
obviously cant right. ahhhh!!!!!! help. i dunno
what to do now, i choice to go for two different
overseas trips, at two very different places, for
two very different reasons and with very different
people. how?ugh. damn lah. jeremy used that
idiot's phone to call me ytd. it was a missed call
but still. both of them r idiots now. ugh. i had
a weird dream last night, sth along the lines of
cat class ppl, geraldine and fried rice. oh well
nvm. i spend alot of time during NPDP trainings
eavesdropping haha. so i know that we're getting
our new unit tee next week ! yay ! i think im not
going for camp. oh i dunno. gotta think. i gtg.
got homework to finish, might blog again later.
dyingdyingdead
the emerald ocean
10:36:00 AM
Thursday, March 01, 2007
fuck fuck fuck fuck fuckeverything just sucks. i cant .i cant. i cant. i wanna cry.i wanna cut myself. i wannaget out of school.i wanna die.fuck
the emerald ocean
10:22:00 PM
Hold me in your arms, tell me all the things I want to hear. whisper my wishes, keep me safe and warm, kiss me gently, tell me I’ll be ok, reassure me, run your fingers through my hair, hug me tight, sing to me softly, lull me into my much needed beauty sleep, wash away my sadness, let me feel ok, let me have a peaceful sleep, talk to me, don’t make me cry, don’t make me cry.
the emerald ocean
1:21:00 PM